Georgia man walks out of woods naked, slaps ‘his behind’ near kids’ football practice
In the oft-uncolorful language of police reports, the first line of a write-up in early August was at once bland and pricelessly descriptive.
A Monroe County sheriff’s deputy noted that on the afternoon of Aug. 3 he had been dispatched to a local school, the Monroe County Achievement Center, “in reference to a male subject near the woodline with no clothes on.”
Forsyth cops already had the unclothed man in custody. The man, 26, of nearby Bunn Road, said he had been in rehab and was dropped off in the area the night before.
“He advised that he was waiting to be picked up by his mother,” the report noted. “All (he) had on his person was a pair of basketball shorts.” (Shorts that, according to the police account, the man was not wearing.)
Another man at the scene said that he and a group of 20 kids were on the school’s football field for practice when the naked guy “came out of the woods fully undressed and began to ‘slap his behind’ and shout things at them.”
It was unclear what the nude man was yelling or why he was in the buff. He was jailed on a public indecency charge.
Dispatches: Early one Sunday morning in May, a Monroe deputy spotted a gold Dodge Ram pickup partially parked on the railroad tracks at Klopfer Road and U.S. 41 in Bolingbroke. The truck was stuck and its driver was spinning its wheels to, as a sheriff’s report put it, “get the vehicle unstuck.” The driver, soon to be charged with DUI, was “actively vaping,” his speech slurred, his eyes red and glassy. When the deputy asked him what had happened, the driver, 43, replied, “Nothing.” He then added, “My wife is coming to get me.” Which was true. He had called her to retrieve him, the report said, but before she headed that way she called the cops and informed them he was “heavily intoxicated.” . . . A report of “a juvenile acting out” came to the attention of a Monroe deputy. On the evening of Aug. 2, a woman on Pine Grove Church Road said her son, his age not noted, was “out of control.” She said that earlier in the day, among other misbehavior, the boy had pulled off her hat and thrown it.