‘I’m not ashamed of who I am.’ Houston County transgender cop shares her story

Editor’s note: Telegraph reporter Joe Kovac Jr. recently interviewed transgender Houston County sheriff’s investigator Anna Lange. Lange, who has said she is being discriminated against because the county won’t make changes in its health insurance to cover gender confirmation surgery, asked the county commission to add transgender health care to its insurance plan. So far, the county has not done that. Lange, a 46-year-old divorcee and Atlanta-area native with a son in middle school, has worked in law enforcement for more than two decades. As a cop, she specializes in financial-crime sleuthing and elder-abuse cases. She began openly transitioning from male to female a couple of years ago. Lange’s hobbies include bicycling, beekeeping and refereeing soccer games. Over a span of years as a hiker, she trekked the entire Appalachian Trail. Quotes gleaned from her conversation with The Telegraph lend insight and perspective to her personal struggle. Lange’s words — in paragraph form and lightly edited for clarity — appear below:

I went to Auburn for forestry. I knew I wanted an outside job — minus digging ditches. ... I looked into becoming a game warden, took some criminal justice classes and here I am.

I really first started transitioning in ’04. But it was only brief. I was married. My son had just been born. ... So much guilt. You commit to somebody and have a child. I wanted to be the husband and the dad. And so I felt a lot of guilt. So I held off transitioning for a long, long time. The second time when I started transitioning, in 2016, that’s when I finally kind of realized that this is what I needed to do.

You’re on medicine that completely wipes out your testosterone. ... My brain is finally thinking the way it always should have.

“Anna” just kind of fits my personality. Just simple. Just a plain, simple name. I just liked it. Nothing fancy, just an everyday name.

If you’re unsure what the person wants to be called, just ask.

The big misunderstanding that I’ve seen on social media is that people think this is a cosmetic procedure. It’s not. Now it has some cosmetic properties, but there’s way more to it. The American Medical Association has shown that it’s a medical necessity and even the insurance companies recognize it as a medical necessity.

Folks in the trans community, we’re not asking you to give special treatment. Just be fair. Live and let live. We didn’t ask for this any more than you chose to be a man or a woman or black, white or Asian. So why be so hostile? Why be so hateful? I don’t get it.

Some people said that I just want publicity, but if I had just had health insurance you would’ve never heard of me.

One thing my mom and I talked about, she said, “You never see any straight people having marches.” And it’s like, “Because y’all don’t have to.” That’s why these discussions and these interviews are important.

I don’t think any person in this situation that’s transgender or gay or anything would wake up and go, “You know, that would be fun. Let’s do that. I think transitioning would be fun.” It’s a rough, rough process. I mean, I’ve lost family, friends. Having to get up in front of the county commissioners knowing that all this would go public, I didn’t want that.

I’m not ashamed of who I am. It’s not something I chose to do. I didn’t choose to feel this way. Just like somebody that’s a diabetic or has depression issues. They didn’t choose to have those issues.

I started taking the hormones, the medicine. I rocked on for six months and I just realized that this was it. I was happy. I knew that I had to do this. I was happy, but at the same time I just knew that transitioning and in law enforcement and just in this area in general, I knew that it was gonna be tough.

I was terrified telling the sheriff and my co-workers. That was not an easy conversation. But once that was over, it was just like, “I did it.”

I remember pulling into work every day going, “Today’s not the day, today’s not the day.” And then I pulled up one day and I said, “Today’s the day.” I asked basically to follow the female dress-code policy. And I don’t think the sheriff really, I don’t think he really understands a lot of that. I know he’s a conservative person, as most of his constituents are, and I am too to a degree. So he wasn’t thrilled about it. ... But there’s a reason he’s stayed in office for 46 years. He’s good to his people. If you’re doing a good job then he’s gonna keep you on.

I took an oath to serve and protect, and to me, whether you agree with it or not, I guess I feel like I’m still doing that by fighting for this.

Somebody phrased it really well: The fear of continuing to live the way I was outweighed the fear of telling people. It got to the point for me that I just didn’t care what people thought.

When I was married and I had a son, I had everything a man could ask for. I just wasn’t happy. So, yeah, and now I know why. ... It doesn’t mean that there hasn’t been carnage along the way. It’s tough. I still feel pretty bad for tearing the family apart. I take credit for it. I dwelled on that for a long time, too long probably. I’m still close with my son. We still do a lot of fun stuff, so that relationship hasn’t really been affected.

I’m happier just going into work. Sometimes I’ve been able to use kind of what I’m going through as a tool to connect with some people.

I’ve had one person that I know of complain on me, but that was the mother of a son that I arrested. I think they were just wanting a reason to complain. They said I showed up at the jail wearing a women’s blouse and flip-flops. Of course, they pulled the video and I wasn’t. I was in my uniform.

You may not agree with me or believe in what I’m doing, or you might think it’s immoral. But it’s not your life. I’m comfortable with who I am.

People don’t understand about being transgender. ... I’ve always felt this way. There’s no turning it off.

Fifth grade, around that age, is when it really kind of hit. ... You learn to hide yourself to keep from getting picked on. Luckily for me, I was athletic.

I think I’m far enough along that if nobody knew who I was, to me, they can’t really tell. It hasn’t really been an issue. I’ve never had somebody holler at me in public. Never.

I’ve had people come up and say, “Hey, I saw you on the news. I just want to say I support you.”

My hat’s off to women. Guys have it made. What used to take me 20 minutes to shower and then go to work, shoot, it takes me 20 minutes to get the tangles out of my hair in the morning. ... But it’s more than just the clothing. For me it’s letting go of my old habits of keeping things hidden or having that macho bravado.

Anything that’s out of the norm of what everybody goes through or lives with on a daily basis, you get attacked because it’s different. Strange is just a different point of view. That’s a Sister Hazel quote, by the way.

There’s still a lot of fear for people to come out and be open. It’s just like years ago with women voting. Unless somebody steps forward and stands up, nothing’s gonna change.

This story was originally published April 5, 2019 at 1:00 AM.