The Sun News

KENT: Spring break is a season of dumb questions

Spring break is over for the school year, but it really never started for our family. When you have a child who plays high school baseball, you don’t have spring break.

Football players don’t have fall break -- and pray not to have Thanksgiving break because that means they are still in the playoffs -- while basketball players practice and have tournaments during the Christmas holidays. With about 30 games on their schedule and a deadline to be done by the end of the school year, baseball “bats through” spring break.

So while my friends posted pictures on Facebook from places like Tybee Island and Destin, Florida, I spent last week with a lot of other baseball moms and dads at baseball fields.

There is one advantage to the fact that spring break is taken up with baseball. Because Scotty has been confined to Warner Robins for the past four spring breaks, we have never had to have a serious spring break conversation -- the one that starts with “Can I go to Panama City?” and ends with me lying on the floor laughing.

We had a mini conversation this year -- one of many around here nowadays that start with “I am almost 18.” What is it about being almost 18 that makes a teenager think they are grown?

Anyway, Scotty asked if he could “run” down to PCB -- it is obviously a sign of age to refer to Panama City as well, Panama City -- over the weekend and be back for baseball practice Monday afternoon. I don’t really know why my kids torture themselves by asking me stupid questions because I am incapable of just replying with something simple like “no, I don’t think that’s a good idea” when they ask me something dumb.

Note: Remember in class when your teacher said there wasn’t ever a dumb question? That rule does not apply to almost-18-year-old boys. They actually have a lot of dumb questions. “Can I stay out until 1?” “May I borrow $100?” -- this one is usually followed by a dumb statement “I will pay you back,” and then you are a parent are left with absolutely no choice but to say the obvious: “Pay me back with what? You don’t have a job?”

So when offered the option of allowing my son to be treated like something who is “almost 18” and funding a weekend during spring break in PCB, what I did was reply the following: “No you can’t go to Panama City. I don’t care that you are almost 18. When you are 28 you can’t go to spring break in Panama City. As a matter of fact, when you are 80 and I am dead and gone, you are still not allowed to go to Panama City during spring break.”

Scotty is a senior and baseball will end for us in a few weeks. Next year, his father and I will be faced with an actual 18-year-old who actually has the whole week off from school.

That gives me a whole year to come up with my answer to next year’s dumb question.

To contact Alline Kent, email or call 396-2467