Play along with me. All you need is a piece of paper and a pen or a pencil.
Write down the first name of your favorite author.
Next, get the book you’re currently reading. If, like the Cool Kid, you read more than one at a time, get the last one you read from.
Look to see how many pages are in it. Add the numerals together (387 pages would give you the number 18, 524 pages would be 11, and so on). Take the number you get and count through the alphabet until you hit the letter that corresponds with that number. For example, 18 would be the letter R.
Write down an American city that begins with that letter.
Finally, looking at that same book, decide what the predominant color of the cover is and write down the name of a fruit that is also predominantly that color.
Here it comes ...
John Portland Boysenberry.
Thank you, you’re very kind.
Oh, really now?
Ayn Hoboken Banana.
Robert Tallahassee Tangerine.
e.e. Cumberland Kiwi.
Stephen Honolulu Lime.
J.K. Pine Stump Junction Granny Smith Apple.
Oh yeah? Same to you.
I’ve got no more time for this. I’m a high-powered newspaper executive with a lot of high-powered newspaper executive stuff I’ve got to get done.
Beside, if this column were “The Cool Kid’s Guide to Mind Reading,” it would be labeled as such.
Sue Fargo Fig.
To contact writer Randy Waters, call 744-4240.