...But no, didn't fall down on my knees. It's just not often I get to quote Robert Johnston.
Actually, I'm referring to the Crossroads Writers Conference, which takes place this weekend on the campus of Mercer University. I'll be one of the speakers/moderators, though I should stress that there will be some actual good writers on the panels.
For a complete schedule of events and roster of guests, or to register for the conference, visit www.crossroadscon.org.
I'm scheduled for three panels right now -- one on blogging (and how not to get paid for it, apparently), a second on "The Willing Suspension of Disbelief," which will deconstruct everything from "24" to "No Country For Old Men," and I'll be moderating a panel.
That session will be with TV writers Jeffrey Stepakoff, who was a writer for "Simon & Simon," "Major Dad" and "Dawson's Creek," and Fulvia Lindsay, who has written for "CSI" and is developing her own TV pilot. Stepakoff's book, "The Billion Dollar Kiss," which details his long TV career, is one of the best books about the TV industry you will ever read.
We'll also have writers of poetry, novels, short stories, business writers, journalists and much more, so if you live in Middle Georgia, I encourage you to register.
BRISTOL PALIN MAKES ACTING DEBUT: ABC Family announced Tuesday that Bristol Palin will make her acting debut on the series "Secret Life of An American Teenager" when the show returns later this summer. Palin is the daughter of former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin and one of the most famous teenage single moms around, so it could be an interesting episode.
ACTOR DISAPPEARS: Canadian authorities are looking for actor Andrew Koening ("Growing Pains"), the son of former "Star Trek" star Walter Koening. The younger Koening suffers from clinical depression and has been missing for more than a week.
LENO'S FIRST GUESTS: NBC announced the first guests for Jay Leno's return to "The Tonight Show" March 1. The guests are Jamie Foxx and Olympian Lindsay Vonn, with a musical performance from Brad Paisley.
WEDNESDAY'S BEST BETS: If you don't like the Olympics (NBC, 8 p.m.) or "American Idol" (Fox, 8 p.m.), then it's going to be a quiet TV night for you.
Cables offers "Psych" (USA, 10 p.m.) and the penultimate "Nip/Tuck" (FX, 10 p.m.), but that's about it.