Mother’s greatest gift is sons’ friendship

May 22, 2013 

Every year in May, we celebrate Mother’s Day. I did so myself this year. My family had lunch with my parents, and then I spent the afternoon with my children.

But while the calendar says that Mother’s Day is in the spring, for me, Mother’s Day will always be Aug. 31, 2012.

That is the day that will be forever ingrained into my heart as the day I knew I had succeeded as a mother.

It had less to do with me and more to do with my boys. Our oldest, Ronnie, had gone off to college Aug. 1 and came home for the first time the afternoon of Aug. 31. His father and I had seen him in between when we made an “I forgot something” run to his college, but his brother had not.

Shortly after Ronnie arrived in Warner Robins, I received an “I need food” phone call from my other son, Scotty, who as a member of the football team was at the school waiting on the game that evening.

Ronnie rode with me to the high school for the food drop, and Scotty came outside to the parking lot for the delivery. When my two sons saw each other, for the first time in about a month, there was a look of joy on their faces that was indescribable. They bear-hugged, and Scotty said thanks for the food and went back to join his teammates. Ronnie got back in the car and we drove off.

It was probably the best 30 seconds of my life.

All I ever wanted in raising my two sons was for them to be friends. I wanted them to be as close as well, brothers. I wanted them to love each other, sure. But what I really wanted was for them to like each other.

Ronnie and Scotty are as different as two boys could be, so it worried me some when they argued about the television and fought over toys that they would take their childhood squabbles to adulthood, as so many siblings do, unable to forgive the trespasses that we all make as we are growing up.

I could have sought advice or read a book on sibling rivalry. But instead, I simply decided to follow my parents’ example.

I never intervened in their arguments. I never refereed their fights. When they would come to me bickering, Ronnie and Scotty were instructed to work it out themselves and to bother me again only if someone needed stitches. Tough words I guess, but almost always the name-calling would subside and the laughing would start again.

There were days, mostly when they both were not quite teens, that I worried that they couldn’t stand each other. Again, I followed the example set by my parents.

I prayed for their relationship.

I received wonderful gifts from my husband and children on Mother’s Day and was treated like a queen that Sunday.

But the best gift I have ever received as a mother is the joy that my children receive from each other and the bond that they have made together.

Contact Alline Kent at 396-2467 or allinekent@cox.net.

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