So how do you rate a place that transcends time? Old Clinton was around before me and will probably be around long after. It's been in the media more times than I have been, too. Maybe the best thing to do is re-create a visit to this venerable establishment.
When you drive up to Old Clinton BBQ, you can feel the clock ticking backwards. It's been open since 1958 and after looking at the photo from that year on its Web site, it hasn't changed at all. After you pull into the dirt parking lot and visit the goats over to the side, you walk under an overhang straight out of Mayberry RFD. Instead of Hudsons and Packards, though, you'll likely see motorcycles and sport utility vehicles from as far away as Rhode Island and New Jersey. It's not hard to tell the locals from the out-of-towners. The locals are just geehawing at the tables while the foreigners look around at all the stuff on the walls while they try to blend in.
Up at the tall wooden counter, check out the glass-bottled Cokes and Sprites after you order from the plastic-lettered menu board. Pick out your sides, like slaw, potato salad, or Brunswick stew, then pick which 14-layer cake looks best today. While the Bosco chocolate icing wasn't my cup of tea, the caramel was yummy. If you ask who made the desserts, you'll find out that "a lady we know" made the chocolate and caramel cakes, but Sara Lee made the carrot cake.
While you sit at your table waiting for your order, look around at all the stuff that's accumulated during 50 years: black iron cash registers, newspaper clippings, photos of the founders that started it all. On the TV (stress the first letter when you say it), the episode of "Dirty Jobs" with this very restaurant is playing on a loop; if you miss it the first time the filthy host walks out of the barbeque pit, you can catch it the next time around.
In no time at all, your plate is up, dressed with two slabs of white bread and a pickle. Maybe you ordered the smoked ribs, or a barbeque sandwich or a half of a smoked turkey - either way you can't lose. Now, some folks are keen on tomato-based sauce, but this is vinegar all the way. It keeps your arteries clean and your tongue perky. The Brunswick stew seems to be an acquired taste, but the other sides go well with the tangy meat. Wash it all down with that bottled soda and you've got a lovely Saturday afternoon going.
Check them out on the Internet at www.oldclintonbbq.com to find their menu and catering options. If you're looking to visit a place that will take you back in time, drive up Gray Highway and visit a spell. You just might forget that it's the 21st century.
Old Clinton BBQ
4214 Gray Highway, Gray
Two and a half stars
Hours: 10 a.m.-8 p.m. Sunday-Thursday, and 10 a.m.-9 p.m. Friday and Saturday
Phone: (478) 986-3225
Payment: Cash, credit cards
Reservations: No
Dress: Very casual
Children's menu: Yes
Vegetarian selections: Yes
Wheelchair accessible: Yes
Noise level: Low
Health code: 100
Alcohol: No
Price range: Inexpensive
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